QUALIFIED
Sexologist · Sexual Health Alliance (USA)
QUALIFIED
ANZCAL Associate
FEATURED IN
FEATURED IN
FEATURED IN
WELCOME
The sex education you didn't get.
The passion you still can.
If you're anything like me, you've probably got a few unanswered questions floating around when it comes to sex, intimacy and pleasure — questions you've never really had anyone to ask.
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Hi, I'm Rachel. I'm a qualified sexologist, sex coach and educator based in Auckland, and I work with women, men and couples across New Zealand who are ready to stop the guess work, finally get some real honest answers — and yes, have a lot of fun in the process.
I believe that every person, and every relationship, deserves to experience true passion and pleasure. But for many of us, the reality looks very different.
Desire fades. Intimacy drifts. Pleasure feels out of reach. Sex becomes another thing on the to-do list — or disappears from it altogether.
These issues are more common than most people admit — and most people stay silent, hoping things will improve on their own (spoiler alert, they don't usually). ​
The fundamentals of pleasure and intimacy aren't taught to anyone: not to women, not to men, not to couples. It's no wonder so many people end up missing out. If we don't learn it at school, where do we learn it? Spicy books? Porn? Gossip with your friends? The latest Instagram influencer?
​​Sure, those might be entertaining. But they’re not exactly education. Sex and intimacy are some of the most important parts of a relationship, and most of us have never been properly taught about either. The good news? A little knowledge, the right encouragement, and some honest conversation go a very long way.​
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This is exactly why I created The Passion Project. Real education & coaching. Honest conversation. Practical tools. And yes, plenty of excitement along the way, because we are talking about sex and intimacy after all. Delivered warmly, by someone who has been exactly where you are.
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Whether you're a woman reconnecting with yourself, a man wanting to show up differently, or a couple ready to reignite what you have — you're in the right place.
400+
women, men, and couples who've attended coaching, education, and events with Rachel across New Zealand.
HOW I CAN HELP
Find the right way in.
Whether you're showing up for yourself, for your partner, or as a couple — there's a way in that fits where you are right now.
Not sure where you sit? Start with a free 15-minute intro call. BOOK A FREE CALL >
THE PROMISE
"This is not crisis therapy.
This is choosing more."
You don't have to be struggling to be here. You just have to be curious — and done waiting for things to improve on their own.
MEET RACHEL
A sexologist who knows what a boardroom looks like.
Before I retrained as a sexologist, I spent twenty years in financial services. Investments. FinTech. Banking. I have a Bachelor of Business and an NZX Diploma, and I have sat in (and presented to) more boardrooms than I can count.
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I also spent most of those years quietly wondering if there was something wrong with me when it came to sex.​
​It wasn't until I turned 40 that I finally figured out the answer. There was nothing wrong with me. There was just a huge gap between what I'd been taught about pleasure and what was actually true. So I retrained, properly, and built The Passion Project so other women, men and couples wouldn't have to wait that long to find out. My goal is to make pleasure accessible, normal, and something every person and every couple can experience with confidence and joy.
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Because pleasure is powerful. And we all deserve to actually understand it.
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​I talk about sex because someone has to — and I'm not afraid to. Too many of us stay silent on the very conversations that could change everything.
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I've published a book, been featured in the NZ Herald, Capsule NZ, and Woman's Day, and I speak to professional audiences across New Zealand about exactly this.
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A FEW THINGS WE WERE NEVER TOLD
The numbers nobody talks about.
<30%
of women reliably orgasm from penetrative sex alone. Which tells us most of us need more focus on the clitoris, please.
70%
of women primarily experience responsive (rather than spontaneous) desire. It is completely normal not to feel "in the mood" out of nowhere.
85%
of NZ men don't feel confident in the bedroom. Which is not a personal failing — it is an education gap.
SIGNATURE PROGRAMS
More than 1:1 coaching.
01
The Passion Retreat
​A four-night couples intimacy retreat in Rarotonga. August 2026. Beachfront, beautifully run, and built for couples who want to find each other again, properly, with the time and space to actually do it.
02
The Pleasure Lab
​In person, and online workshops about desire, pleasure, communication and connection, for women, men and couples. Education-led, sex-positive, and run like grown-up conversations should be. Also a lot of fun.
03
Reclaimed (Keynote)
A keynote on women, desire, and the right to want more. Booked by leadership conferences, women's summits, and corporate wellbeing events across New Zealand.
DON'T JUST TAKE MY WORD FOR IT
They showed up. Here's what they said.
She is the real deal. I'd challenge anyone to not feel more amazing about themselves after spending time with her.
NICKY B. — COACHING CLIENT
Rachel creates a space that feels safe yet inspiring. Her approach is both fun and deeply insightful — she knows how to push you without making you feel overwhelmed. I can't recommend her highly enough.
SCOTT B. — COACHING CLIENT
The perfect mix of playfulness, cheek and humour. Also surprisingly informative. We'll definitely be back.
PHILIPPA — PLEASURE LAB ATTENDEE
COMMON QUESTIONS
The questions everyone has.
What does a sexologist actually do? A sexologist is a qualified educator and coach in sexuality and pleasure. I help women, men and couples understand themselves — desire, arousal, communication, confidence, all the things we should have been taught and never were. My work is education-led. Not clinical. Not therapy. Just real information and coaching, delivered properly.
Is this going to be awkward? Less than you think. Most people tell me, within about ten minutes of the first session, that it actually feels weirdly normal — because for the first time someone is talking about this stuff like an adult. You can ask anything. Honestly, there is nothing I have not been asked before.
What actually happens in a session? Sessions are one-to-one conversations — entirely talk-based. There is no touch, no physical component, and no somatic bodywork of any kind. We talk through what's going on for you, I share relevant education, and we build a practical picture of what would genuinely help you moving forwards and this is the basis of the coaching plan. Most clients tell me by the end of the first session that it felt like a relief. Finally, someone is talking about this stuff like it's normal. Which, of course, it is.
Is this for couples in crisis? No — and this is an important one. This is not crisis therapy. If your relationship is in real distress, you need a couples therapist (and there are wonderful ones out there). My work is for couples who already love each other and just want their relationship to feel electric again. Different work entirely.
Do I have to be in Auckland to work with you? Not at all. I'm based in Auckland and I do see clients in person here, but most of my 1:1 work happens online with clients across New Zealand and overseas. Workshops and retreats are in person; coaching can be either, whatever works best for you.
Do I need to be in a relationship to work with you? Not at all. Some of my most powerful work happens with people who are single — whether that's someone who has just come out of a long relationship and is finally ready to understand themselves better, or someone who simply wants to know more about their own desire before their next relationship. You don't need a partner to benefit from this work. You just need to be curious.
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